Wake up. Shower. Hair. Make Up. Eat. Get Dressed. Pack Lunch. Drive. Work. Eat. Work. Drive. Read. Drive. Dance. Dance. Dance. Drive. Clean. Get Ready. Bed. Sleep. Wake Up. Shower. Hair. Make Up. Eat. Get Dressed. Pack Lunch. Drive. Work. Eat. Work. Drive. Chat. Kiss. Hug. Cuddle. Talk. Cry. Drive. Cuddle. Make Out. Drive. Say Goodbye. Drive. Eat. Get Ready. Lie Down. Cry cry cry sleep… wake up shower hair make up eat dress lunch drive work eat read work drive eat drive dance dance dance dance drive clean clean clean cry cry eat cry get ready cry sleep sleep sle… wake up. work out. eatshowerhairmakeupfoodomgfood drive workfuckingkillmework drive wait wait wait say hi cuddle make out cry whine cry whine complainfuckinghatemylife saygoodbyepleasedontleavemewithmyself drive drive drive crysleepwakeupsleepwakeupsleepcrywakeupsleep WAKE UP showerhairmakeupwhateverilooklikecrap drivefuckmedrive workmybosssuckswork work out sweat eatsomething cry drive clean clean clean clean fuck my life clean clean clean fuck my life sleepwakeup…
Repeat for a few months.
Repeat for a few years.
Repeat for a lifetime.
Repeat.
Repeat.
Repeat.
Isn’t that the most hideous part of it?
I have no right to feel like this. No right at all.
But I do.
So I hate myself more.
Can I wake up now? I’m so sick of feeling like I’m wasting my life.
Please. Someone.
Anyone?
I’m sorry. You’re all reaching out for me, I can hear you. I can see you.
But you can’t help me and that’s the second worst.
First, there’s no way I can justify being so sad.
Second, there’s no way I can say I don’t have anyone to help me.
Third, that makes everything my fault, and right now I’m the last person I need to have more reasons to hate.
Where are the words? Where is the dance?
Where is all my passion?
“There are countless reasons for reading, but when you’re young and uncertain of your identity, of who you may be, one of the most compelling is the quest to discover yourself reflected in the pages of a book.” -How Beautiful the Ordinary
“I could read but lately reading doesn’t even take me out of myself.” She loves you, she loves you not - Julie Anne Peters
I feel like this is the most accurate presentation of what I looked like during the three day novel contest… Like actually.
Except with a coffee cup in hand.
(Source: janemargoliss)
I’m sure you’re all sick of me complaining.
Thank you for those who have reached out to me.
But your kindness can’t change the facts. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
I’m sorry.
You could talk me down.
But I want you to sleep.
I want you to be happy.
I hope I can talk myself down.
